Dream of rat, head, red, family, hanging, rich, roses, way, women, apartment, old, work, building, back, white, crying, wine, barber, club, guitar, shirt, begging, door, elevator, lake, lost, mansion, roof, silver, shop, hair, party, wedding, college, parents, sea, mad, woke up, leopard, heart, black, drunk, night, rock, big, tail, friends, country, furniture, cut, want

At a party. it was a big party at a grand venue or mansion, the kind where rich people would have a wedding. it was for randy and i. I think maybe my parents arranged it. everyone i've ever known was there. family, friends, co workers, even people i barely knew. Randy wasn't there because i didn't tell him about it because we agreed not to hang out that night, and i figured he wouldn't be into it, and i kind of wasn't either. i started to feel a little guilty that he wasn't there, but i figured it would be fine. i got really, super drunk off white wine and stumbled my way through a sea of random women i didn't know, one which i thought was my old friend/co worker heather hill. but it wasn't. they rearragned the furniture before sitting and i remember drunenly stumbling through them and maing some joke about feng shui. then i went downstairs, i had been hanging out on the roof, but it was like a chill apartment building roof. when i got in the elevator, randy was there. i was surprised to see him and asked why he was even there. he was offended and was like of course i'm here, and he was pissed i was drunk. he had his guitar and said he had to go perform. i followed him, drunk and upset, spilling my wine everywhere begging him to not be mad and confused as to why he was. the venue was decorated beautifully. there were deep red decorations everywhere, against a stark white backdrop. tall ceilings, big windows. red hearts, red roses. there was also punk rock decorations, black and spikes and studs. i followed randy outside but lost him. there was a sea of people. it was a huge expansive outdoor area, like what i imagine a country club to be like. there was a little lake with a long dock, and a gazebo, all white. i wandered through the crowds, looked aaround, there were hundreds of people everywhere and i couldn't find randy. eventually i went back inside and down a hallway and he was sucked behind a door. when i found him he seemed unsurprised. behind the door was a world renowed barber shop where he had just gotten his hair cut. he had a black mohawk and it looked amazing. it was stick straight and shiny with red in it, and studs. and it had some clipper work leading from it onto his head. not sure of the design, but it was piecy like leopard print or just a geometrical design. he also had a rat tail from the mohawk with silver accents. it looked amazing. he was putting his shirt back on and he looked at me matter of fact and solemn and just said "i don't think this really has to do with you being drunk" he was implying that we had nothing in common. he said "do you want to just call it quits and leave it at that?" basically like, we gave it the old college try but it just ain't working. my heart immediately sank and i wanted to beg and cry. i woke up crying