Understand My Dreams

Dreams awake

There is a place in my dream, that i have never seen in real life. The first time I dreamt about this place was when i was a little, its been almost 20 years that i still go to the same place in my dream. Its a place because its always the same, everything its always the same. I don’t do anything in the dream, only over the years i have walked in the neighbourhood, i have stayed in my house, same balcone, same couch, same view from the window, i have just discovered the place more and more and nothing changes. That place that i dream of its nothing of the country im from, like the walls,or the lights on the street, or the building. I have googled many places do see if it’s actually a real place in the world, a lot of similarities with some countries but not exactly the same as in my dream. Basically, in this place i have a life, i live there, but not a lot happens, and every time i go there now after this many years it feels like Im not sleeping, like a second home which i know its in a dream and I choose what i want to do. Like deep sleeping but still so wide awake.

It started out with a zombie apocalypse, I didn’t see any zombies I just knew it. I’m out in the hot summer run in a lush green forest, looking for food and shelter. There’s a rustle behind me and I turn, hunter’s knife in hand and it’s an older man with a little kid hiding behind him. They look hungry, hungrier than me. I ask him why dosent he try out for our district’s competition. Sure it’s a zombie apocalypse but we still had a form of government. And this one held a competition twice a year for the common people to live in the capital if they won, runner ups get food. We travel to the compound where it’s being held. Like a metal auditorium, small and the steel is surprisingly not boiling hot. I trained the little girl in preparation for the competition, I’ve grown close with her and her dad. Revealing I had competed when I was 16 and won. But now I was living as an outsider. The compound soon fills with families also competing. We get sat next to a redhead family, I can tell something is off with the dad by the way he sighs as he watches his young twin daughter play. We fill out paperwork as the 13 or so judges come in and take their seats. I recognized a few but one knew me. He smiles and tilts his head in a respectful way. I turn away feeling my face go red. First is the kids spouting off facts about our government. Next to compete are the fathers. They’re made to kill zombies, the red head father almost died. A zombie aiming for his neck, I kicked it away from me and the girls and the guy I’m with kills it. The night ends, the judges leave but we are made to sleep on the steel benches and dirt floor. There’s a small lamp, I remember someone once telling me the capital uses these little lamps to signal for electricity. Turning it off is considered a crime. I’ve competed before, I know what comes the next day. I know I’m the only one awake, I turned it off to give me an extra leg up in tomorrow’s competition. Then it’s tomorrow, everyone wakes. No one notices the lamp. The judges come back, the one I know personally gives me a smile as he sits. I hear whispers. The capital holds this event twice a year because they’re struggling to keep people alive in their secluded area. It’s true. I used to live there so I know it is true. I say nothing, no one can know I competed before. I need to help the little girl and her father, they’re my friends. It’s time to complete. I look over at the tired red headed father and know immediately what he is thinking. I whisper to him, don’t kill yourself, your daughters and wife need you. He looks surprised, I shrug and get down from my seat and stand near his wife. There’s a song we are meant to sing but the tablet with the lyrics isn’t working. There’s no electricity, I made sure of that. I know the default song, it’s the district’s anthem. They have us sing it while they wrote our scores. I sing soft for the parts I know I won’t get right and belt out the parts I know I can nail. This is how I was taught to sing. By the judge that I know. He looks proud I remembered his teachings from when I was younger. I hold back a grimace. They give us our scores, we have to add them together. There’s comments left next to the scores. I notice the judge I know left me a x8. I can multiply my entire score by 8 to get the highest score and win. He leaves me a flirty compliment. The dream ends before I can get my final score.

I was at my cousins house. (We went there to my little cousins second birthday the other day in real life). I was walking to their guest bathroom when I felt scared, that somebody might already be in there and I didnt want it to be embarrassing. It suddenly went pitch black, my heart was beating. I didnt see anything but I heard a small kid laugh, running on a field/on grass. While she was running she fell. I heard hear almost starting to cry just like a small kid would when they fell. The sounds stopped and I heard a womens voice, like a narrator, in a serious tone. Pretty, serious voice. "If.. in your head, then..." - I dont remember much of it. I was conscious as soon as it went pitch black and I heard the kid. I tried waking up and opening my eyes but it was hard. Like something was trying to keep my eyes closed. I woke up. After a reassuring I was awake I closed my eyes again. It all happened again just faster. I tried waking up again, this time with moving. It was also hard but I managed to move my finger and wake up.

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