Understand My Dreams

Dreams ears

I’m trying to walk in a big city but all the buildings are moving around and changing into all sorts of shapes so I can’t go anywhere. While this is happening, I can feel myself tossing and turning in my bad to try and escape the dream but I just can't open my eyes. I keep tossing and turning but I’m going nowhere in my dream and I still can’t open my eyes and I start to cry. I can hear myself crying and can feel the tears streaming down my face but I still can’t get out of this dream. This goes on for quite a while until I finally get my eyes open and I sit up, still crying.

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I dreamt that I discovered I had an adopted brother and sister my entire life, but my parents had never introduced them as that to us so I never realised. It happened really suddenly that I was at home in New Cross, in my room but as an adult, and I think I'd heard some news story about adoption and it had made me think- I wish I had adopted siblings. And all of a sudden it came over me that I did. I'd had an adopted brother this whole time and I had never realised / put 2 and 2 together. I collapsed in tears of joy and sadness at the same time. I ran to where my mum and sister Joanna were tidying away clothes and tried to help and ask questions but I could barely function. My adopted brother was there too - he was a tall, handsome Asian man, very gentle and kind. I asked my mum and dad questions - it turns out they adopted two children, a Polish girl (who was not as close, a difficult adoption it seemed) and this Asian boy, who we had always grown up with and never questioned why. I asked my dad why they never explained to us: "because your mother said you children might not accept / try to sabotage them if you saw them as competition, so decided it was better to not say anything at all." This was classic my parents' approach to parenting- not trusting the kids and keeping their own confidences. I ran away from the room and as I ran I kept collapsing in floods of tears. My whole sense of being and understanding of who I was felt shaken, but I was also overwhelmed with love and affection for this sibling I had never recognised as such. The whole time he was there, quietly and gently present, aware of the emotional roller coaster I was going through and I had hugged him many times in tears already, and apologised for not knowing sooner. I ran upstairs - collapsing in piles of tears alof the way - back to my bedroom where he was in the bed and threw myself into his arms in the darkness and in my tears. I woke up then, not 100% sure if the love I expressed in that moment was more than that for a brother. It was possibly the relief of finding a soul mate. I dreamt this after an argument with my brother who earlier that day said he could not help me / give me advice about my relationship with Ben. I was very hurt and cried a lot - similarly completely overwhelmed / isolated. I felt quite betrayed by him in that moment. He has always been my closest confidante.

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I dreamed I was in a cage with a bear (dark brownish black) I was afraid he was going to hurt me, (it was some kind of Job). He was lay around and than may get up and roar or stand up on two hind legs. Someone was with me, they were small meaning not significate but present. I kept telling people he was going to hurt, they kept say no his isn't, it will be okay, I wrestled with it most of the night I have never dreamed about a bear. I have worn a gold bear necklace symbolizing me as the mother bear over his cubs, I wore a smaller necklace with three baby bears as a symbol of my three children I usually do not dream I recently lost the love of my life, he died 9/9,I have been in deep weeping

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