Understand My Dreams

Dreams cow

So last night I dreamt I was with my partner who is split gender, who goes by Anna, apparently I develop feelings for her and we kinda hang out/coworkers. Well in front of everyone, you, my family, and other friends this girl walks up and said she was Anna's fiancé. I was so heartbroken I woke up sobbing. After I calmed my self down and went back to sleep. The dream continue I ran to my hotel room, apparently we were staying at a hotel, lock myself self in went to my bed and just sobbed. Then she came in apparently had the key too. She told me it was all a lie that the girl was stalking her and that she loved me. I asked her over and over was that the truth or did just felt bad for me. She said it was the truth. But the I was afraid that we couldn't be together because in society she consider a female even though she has male parts on the bottom, and my Dad wouldn't accept, but she tells me my dad gave her his blessings, because she told she was really supposed to be born a guy. Then the alarm goes off.

It was night time and there were people gathered very rowdy and intoxicated huge Loud loud evil heavy music I've not heard before was blaring all around me along with people yelling and talking laughing and screaming at eachother and meanly hurling insults. Huge fires in fire pits and it was like some sort of wild bonfire party. But these people were not nice they were rowdy fighting screaming and all sorts of bad things were happening. They gathered around me in a big circle myself with arms tied behind my back and I was disheveled and bleeding from my nose and beat up but not crying. I remember two woman sitting on giant pair of Buffalo Horn mounted on a tall doorway we were in a hastily built structure big enough for a crowd to form the circle around me. The woman were jeering at me calling me names and then people began pushing me some spit on me tearing at my clothes. I was beligerant and caught the eye of the women they were dressed like cowgirls I remember. I remember I said how could you do this I am a woman just like you. They laughed and mocked me. I was raped by men beaten and I didn't cry or stop fighting even when they had me down and the men took turns I didn't cry. Then I was alone everything was gone I just remember miles and miles of dirt and dust blowing all around my body but I wasn't in my body anymore I was looking down at it from above. The silence was awe striking.I think I must have been dead.

I dreamt I lived on a property with my husband. (In real life he died a year ago). I was sitting on the grass just outside the fence and a white cow leaned her head through and gently nuzzled me and licked my face. I heard my husband call out, "I think you have a friend for life there." Then I was sitting on the ground just outside the dooor to our house. Icould see inside a packet of chips. Half had been eaten, and it was closed to keep fresh. Next to it was an open chip packet filled with beautiful yellow lemons. My husband was further away outside the house with another woman. I ealised if I wanted him to come back to me I had to love and take care of myself.

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