Understand My Dreams

Dreams beads

I fell asleep at roughly 11:15 on Monday, which was much later than usual. I am wondering if the odd dream I had was in any way attributed to the disruption of my sleeping patterns. Perhaps as I recall these dreams over time, I will be able to conjure up something resembling an answer. Every once in awhile, there will be something that makes me fall in love with the human mind all over again—dreams are one of those things. They are the pictures I wish I could see with my mind in a conscious state. First of all, I don’t remember the dream in its entirety, and the parts I do remember are fuzzy and difficult to recall in details great or small. Before going to bed, I remember feeling embarrassed because I had fudged the name of my favorite Dodos album. I like being right—not in the obnoxious way that makes me correct everyone all the time, but in the way that makes me feel silly when I make mistakes. Trudging forward, I had asked a friend, Kaveh, what his all-time favorite album was. I knew what it was the first time we were friends, but I wanted to see if time had changed his answer. In my days at Purdue, my favorite way to talk to someone new was to ask him or her about music. Naturally, one of our first conversations, and probably the only one that I remember so clearly, started with the same question on which our communication ended last night. Back then it was Beep Beep’s “Business Casual,” which, as it turns out, hasn’t changed. The funny thing about “all-time favorites,” is that I don’t think people understand that the “all-time” makes their response very important since this is, essentially, the end all be all of your favorite _____________. My mind is scattered, and so it is only appropriate that the writing of my thoughts follow suit. Back to my dream, though. As I mentioned, the details are quite difficult to recall. They enter into the visual part of my mind in little snippets, like in movies when there are flashbacks that are supposed to all of a sudden bring you to this great understanding. I have not reached this understanding yet. I remember the overall color of the dream was blue—it was almost like there was a blue neon sign outside the window of the room I called “bedroom.” I remember being aware that the apartment that I was in was one that I lived in previously, during my time at Purdue. The carpet was the same, I remember that much. The layout of the room, though, was entirely different. A much smaller version of where I once lived. My bed was near the window and it was raining. My blankets were like white, fluffy clouds. I like to think that it was the white pillowy down comforter I have always wanted. At least in my dreams I am comfortable. It was raining outside, which I enjoyed when I found upon coming back to reality that it actually was raining. In the dream it was raining big, full drops. The beads of water made a beautiful pattern on the window—I remember admiring them. I have always loved watching rain on windows. When I was little, I used to sit in the recliner by the window in our living room and pretend the drops of water were racing each other. I didn’t have many friends. That’s beside the point. I remember feeling like I was having a conversation with someone, but I was alone. The next sequence of events is most likely out of order. Maybe as I read over them upon completion I will notice what needs to be rearranged. I noticed that my phone lit up. This part, I think, was brought on by the fact that prior to actually falling asleep, I had texted someone and fell asleep before getting a response. In my dream, it was Kaveh (it was in the world of consciousness as well). It related vaguely to what we were talking about before I drifted off, but there was something unrelated to what we were discussing. I don’t remember what the extra part was, but I remember enjoying it. The details here are quite fuzzy, and at this point the dream skipped around a lot. Maybe I was drifting in and out of sleep; maybe my mind is telling me not to remember. I often times think that our rational minds are waging war with their emotional counterparts. At the dream’s conclusion, or really just the last part that I remember before waking up, it was still raining quite a bit—I think that it had picked up significantly. There was lightning, which made the room light up for fractions of a second. I couldn’t see very well because of the flashing light. I felt confused. There was someone in my bed, but I don’t know who it was. I gave them a hug before they ended up there—a friendly hug that makes me think it was someone I already knew. I can’t recall their face.

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I was in New Orleans to say happy birthday to a friend and she wanted me to join the band and I was a little drunk but I did it anyways and then we went into a random bar and no one was there but a scary lady threw candy and beads at me specifically then everyone else. Then I was playing football with a guy from highschool that I had a huge crush on and he thought I was funny. Then somehow justin timberlake was on my shoulders and I was dancing and he thought it was hilarious and was trying to teach me some moves. But I wandered over to a dock and there was a bunch of people on life preservers exhausted from some endurance class. And Clay Matthews was one of them and he looked like he needed help so I just reached my arm out and he grabbed it and I helped him onto the dock.

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I was living with a man part time that I have loved for 3 years. He just recently got out of prison so he lives with me part time and in the half way house the other part of the time. We seem really happy in the dream and things are good. One night he was not with me and i say a black head on my leg and went to squeeze it out and a big hole appeared in my leg with black and white beads in in. They didn't hurt but when the popped the were green. I was terrified but didn't say anything. The next day I went to pop a pimple and worms came out. I kissed this man then woke up.

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